101 things about Queretaro

Actually the following post was found HERE at the Poulette Family's blog. It was actually titled "101 things about Mexico City". Since Queretaro and Mexico City are relatively close (2 hours away from each other), many, if not all of the "things" listed are similar. Where there might be differences or where I felt I needed to add a little more information, I added my comments in italics.

101 things about Mexico City

By Dennis on March 22nd, 2007

We were taught to be students of the culture in order to effectively minister. Here are 101 things about Mexico City that we have observed since getting here. They aren’t good things or bad things. Many are just different.

1. There are 31 speed bumps between my house and my work. Actually there are 31 speed bumps (topes) between any two points.
2. You will get stood up. Bank on it.
3. If someone talks about “your house,” they are really talking about “their” house. (My house is your house)
4. The banks will be packed on the 15th and the 1st of the month.
5. If you don’t know what it is, don’t eat it. La VERDAD!
6. Brain can be served in a tortilla.
7. Stomach can be served in a tortilla.
8. There are many different types of mole (a typical salsa). It takes a while to find one that you like.
9. There is no Taco Bell. Taco Bell is Mexican food?
10. There are more people in the city at night. This is not true of Queretaro. Queretaro becomes a ghost town around 11 p.m.
11. Asking, how long will it take to get there is considered a stupid question. This is not true of Queretaro. Traveling around the city is very simple and quick.
12. Never say, just follow the green taxi. Especially here in QRO because we do not have "green taxis".
13. Motorcycles don’t have to stay in a lane. And they can pass you going 100 miles an hour and no one blinks an eye.
14. Car alarms are ignored. Always. Car alarms are not a common sound around our area.
15. You can get your side view mirrors stolen off your car.
16. You might see cows in your front yard. YES!!! AND HORSES AND SHEEP AND GOATS. One time we had a bull standing in the middle of the street and was not letting cars pass. YES! This happened in the city! :)
17. Dog poop happens. Yes but not as bad as San Jose, Costa Rica!
18. Bus drivers are not afraid to hit you. I dont think they know that that cars exist.
19. If you get there on time, you’re early.
20. The electricity can go out for no apparent reason. AND the water (as it is right now).
21. You can buy almost anything on the side of the road.
22. Dogs are used as a house alarm.
23. Dogs bark at all hours.
24. There will be someone trying to give you a flyer at a speed bump. Or at a stop sign or at a stop light or in the parking lot or in the...
25. You will tip someone everyday. True but this is good because it is the only income that some people make.
26. Clowns juggle at intersections. They juggle everything from balls to toys to torches... for tips.
27. Stores might be open at the time they say they are open, but probably not.
28. Nobody will leave a message on your answering machine.
29. Nothing ends on time. Time what is that?
30. You can get knock offs of just about everything.
31. Electronics are expensive. Mac is 2x as expensive!
32. Fruit is cheap.
33. If you miss your exit, you change your plans (usually). This is not true for QRO.
34. The map book has over 200 pages (for the city). QRO has 40.
35. If you ask for directions, chances are the person doesn’t know. So their answer is just go straight down the road.
36. There’s one gas company…government owned pemex…no competition there.
37. The gas guy for your house may try to rip you off. YUP.
38. They paint lines on the street by hand.
39. McDonald’s has gigantic playgrounds.
40. Lunch is at 2 or 3 pm.
41. Customer service…what customer service?
42. Pizza has very little sauce (if any).
43. Movies are mostly in English with subtitles.
44. You should really only plan to get one thing done in a day.
45. If someone will be late or not show up to a meeting, they will probably not call you to tell you about it.
46. Stopping at a red light most of the time is optional.
47. There might be a pothole big enough to eat your car in your lane at any time.
48. The pedestrian does not have the right of way.
49. You will be offered just about any type of “fruit water.”
50. Smog (cough, cough) what smog?
51. You should get your car washed everyday like everyone else.
52. If someone thanks you by showing the back of their hand (in a sort of obscene way), it’s normal. LOL!!!
53. Don’t pronounce English words with an English accent or nobody will understand you. For example, you must pronounce “hot dog” with a Spanish accent.
54. By the way, a hot dog is the full thing (dog, bun, ketchup, etc). A salchicha is just the hot dog and can be used as a pizza topping.
55. Ketchup goes on pizza.
56. Music can never be played too loud.
57. Stores hire dancing girls to promote their products.
58. The best way to park your car is backing it in.
59. A money loan to a friend should be seen as a gift.
60. You can get a piñata of whatever cartoon character you can imagine.
61. The word translated right now can mean anytime in the (maybe) future.
62. Cake can have the milk IN IT (and it’s good).
63. You can watch soccer 24 hours a day.
64. If you need to change lanes, just stick your arm out the window and the other person is obligated to let you in.
65. You can back up in your car even if there are people coming up behind you.
66. You can do just about anything in your car if you put on your flashers... like backing down the middle of the "interstate" because you missed your exit 500 yards behind you.
67. If you need windshield wipers, the best place to buy them is on the side of the road.
68. Hardly anything is open on Mondays.
69. You can get stuck in traffic going to the grocery store. Not true here.
70. If you see traffic in an unusual spot, chances are there’s a traffic cop directing (creating) it.
71. Pretty much everyone has a cell phone.
72. If you call a cell phone, you pay for the call.
73. You get 100 outgoing calls per month on your home phone.
74. Traffic roundabouts are dangerous. You could get stuck in one all day.
75. You can get a pre-paid minutes card for your cell phone while waiting at an intersection.
76. In just about every parking lot, someone will ask you if you want your car washed, whether it needs it or not.
77. Parking is almost never free.
78. I hope you like mayonnaise. It will be loaded on your sandwich.
79. Left turns are usually a no-no. You must make a u-turn.
80. You better know how to parallel park.
81. You don’t walk on the sidewalk. You walk on the road... because of uneven sidewalks and dog poop.
82. Uneven pavement is a fact of life.
83. You can buy corn on the cob smothered with mayonnaise and chili powder.
84. Popcorn at the movies must be accompanied by hot salsa.
85. Japanese peanuts aren’t really from Japan (or are they?)
86. Lots of people wear suits and ties.
87. Pizza is 2 for 1 on Tuesday.
88. Movies are 2 for 1 on Wednesday.
89. Everything is “straight ahead” if you ask for directions.
90. The trunks of trees should be painted white…I think it has something to do with bugs.
91. If you see a cop with his lights on, it just means he’s patrolling the neighborhood. It’s not because you did something wrong. Yes they have scared the pants off of me more than once!
92. You might get a receipt for the slip of toilet paper you buy at a public restroom.
93. Babies should be covered all the way pretty much at all times.
94. Children are not allowed to drink cold drinks or they will get sick.
95. Baby car seats are optional.
96. A traveling market can take up a whole street (and cause more traffic).
97. Coca Cola from a bottle goes great with tacos. Yes this is true!
98. Grasshoppers can be eaten live.
99. You should sweep the street in front of your house everyday like everyone else. With a thing that resembles a broom but looks more like 3 dozen sticks jutting out of a broom handle.
100. The garbage men sit in the back of the truck and sort the trash.
101. Personal space doesn’t exist.
102. You can fit 15 people in a Volkswagen beetle

Jesus came...

Who Is Christmas For?

Matt B. Redmond:

Jesus came for those who look in the mirror and see ugliness.

Jesus came for daughters whose fathers never told them they were beautiful.

Christmas is for those who go to “wing night” alone.

Christmas is for those whose lives have been wrecked by cancer, and the thought of another Christmas seems like an impossible dream.

Christmas is for those who would be nothing but lonely if not for social media.

Christmas is for those whose marriages have careened against the retaining wall and are threatening to flip over the edge.

Christmas is for the son whose father keeps giving him hunting gear when he wants art materials.

Christmas is for smokers who cannot quit even in the face of a death sentence.

Christmas is for prostitutes, adulterers, and porn stars who long for love in every wrong place.

Christmas is for college students who are sitting in the midst of the family and already cannot wait to get out for another drink.

Christmas is for those who traffic in failed dreams.

Christmas is for those who have squandered the family name and fortune—they want “home” but cannot imagine a gracious reception.

Christmas is for parents watching their children’s marriage fall into disarray.

You can read the whole thing

here.

Thai Torture

I came up against a 4'6", 90 pound, Thai lady who lives in Seattle who could have destroyed Brock Lesner. She was our waitress at Ma Tai's. I asked her about the spiciness of a particular plate and she said that the plate was a 4 out of 5 stars in hotness and that I would like it. Thinking that it was probably too hot for me and that I should probably choose a 2 1/2 or 3 star plate, I asked her what she usually ate. She politely said, "oh you Americans cant eat like us. I eat a 20 in hotness".
So my machismo took over and thought, "If this little lady can eat a 20, there is NO WAY that I am going to order less than a 4. And what does she mean "you Americans"."
Three bites into it I started crying like a little girl... And it only got worse. Though I wanted to stop eating, it tasted so good I couldn't stop... Besides I was not going to let her see me not eat it, even if she could make Lesner tap out.

It was so good I had what I couldnt finish at lunch, for supper, and I cried again. Except this time I was able to do it in the privacy of my home.
Brock, you may be bad by UFC standards but you BETTER NOT cross Ma Tai.
Boy oh boy! does my stomach hurt this morning.